Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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