His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
love makes seman taste better
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
