gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Randomize
