Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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