he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
