she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
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