I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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