So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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