Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
as a side note pls kill me
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
