Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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