She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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