My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
