i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
