I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Randomize