You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize