Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Randomize
