Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
