You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
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Isn't that what a wingman is for?
and always let your penis be your guide
Oh HELL no...my penis is stupid and blind. I'll listen to his input, but I still make the decisions.
when you wish upon a bar...
But even with Jiminy at his side, Pinocchio still managed to make an ass of himself!
Is that a new sex toy?
Your sexual conscience.
That's his brother Eddie Cricket.