weddingsv make me drug and hornr
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I understand Curling. That high.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
