So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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