Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
She's the barista slut.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize
