I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
you have to choose: penises or morals?
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Randomize
