Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
