last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
