Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Blood and glitter go together right?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize
