my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
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