This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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