but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
