Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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