just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
You've changed since you got that strap on
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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