Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
