Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
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