Got a toothbrush?
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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