Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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