so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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