So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
