i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
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