Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
