Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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