So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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