woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
