Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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