I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Randomize