he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
