I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.