If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
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