You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
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it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.