Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.