Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school