Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
I have a yeast infection.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"