who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Is it because I queefed?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...